The Good News Journal, Volume XIV: The Fabulous Friday Edition – Adventures in the King’s Court

Well, it’s most definitely an exciting Friday Edition with much [Good] News to report! As per usual, Court did not go as I expected it might, and although I always anticipate that it won’t and do what I can to be as prepared as possible anyway, figuring out how to rescind a bench warrant for My arrest was not on My agenda and not something I was particularly looking forward to dealing with on the fly, but that quickly became My most urgent task of the day.  I’m here to Write of the experience, so welcome to the Fabulous Friday Edition [even if You read this later].

My morning started off great; crisp clothes, well groomed, stylish and confident.  I arrived early as usual and once again decided to visit the clerk’s office to see if I could get a copy of My letters printed for the prosecution [it is important to Keep the original documents].  The clerk obliged Me this time (same lady), though she wasn’t entirely thrilled about doing it and explained to Me that it is not the clerk’s duty to make copies.  I apologized and said to her that I thought it was the responsibility of the clerks and she advised Me that there is a photo copier available for that near the information desk.  So I understand why she didn’t seem thrilled about copying My documents.  I don’t know these things, so I felt a little foolish; in Guelph, the [Supreme] Court Clerks were happy to make copies for Me and receive My documents.  By 8:37 in the morning (no coincidences), I was as ready and prepared as I could have been, a duplicate copy of each of the letters that were as King of Me for the Justice.

I had time for a short coffee recess outside and made My Way to the courtroom for 8:55.  When the Justice entered, I was immediately surprised to find it was not Justice Perkins-McVey, and the new Justice did not introduce himself to the Court so I couldn’t tell You who it was.  It would be the third Justice over three Court dates, so it seemed reasonable to presume that perhaps any Justice available that day may be as King to serve the Court and they do not necessarily stay on the same Case, though that doesn’t seem very logical to Me.  As the morning progressed, it seemed more and more like I was in the wrong courtroom as one of the lawyers had over twenty consecutive matters and it was already 9:30, so I decided to take a washroom break and see if the schedule had been posted outside the courtroom (as it was not yet up when I arrived).  Sure enough, when I return from the washroom, I discover My name is not on the list so I go back to the clerk’s office to find out what is going on.  The clerk tells Me that I was scheduled to be in Court on Thursday at 9:00 a.m. and that a bench warrant has been issued for My arrest.  Fabulous Friday became furious Friday very quickly, let Me tell You!  I maintained My composure, showed the clerk My little notebook where I Write My Court dates, to which she very plainly stated she was sorry for My misfortune but I would have to turn My Self into police.  Not feeling any less angry, but I knew it wasn’t the clerk’s fault, so I said thank You and proceeded to the Police department on the lower level of the courthouse.  This is where My Story becomes a little more interesting.

I was furious, truly – though I knew My anger wasn’t going to help Me.  I do not appreciate being locked up and denied the right to Present My Self to a Court Justice – it is My right and the first duty of a law enforcement officer with a bench warrant anyway!!!  That is their duty on a BENCH Warrant specifically; to arrest You and bring You to the benchbefore a Justice – NOT lock You up until later, much less deny You the right to be heard by a Justice!  Presumption of innocence till proved guilty.

So I go into the courtroom Police station and tell the receptionist that I am there to turn My Self in under duress, stating that as King of someone else to advocate or administrate legal matters on My behalf while I sit in a cell and wait when I am fully capable of Presenting My Self to a Justice right now, feels like a gross trespass upon equality before the law and My common law rights.  The lady working receptions was so kind.

“You don’t have to turn Yourself in, just tell Duty Counsel You missed Your date yesterday and they can rescind the bench warrant.”

I was seriously expecting to immediately be arrested and spend the rest of My day in jail, waiting for some bonehead to speak for Me…  And few things infuriate Me more.  Instead, I made My Way to duty counsel and explained My situation, stating that I had been advised they could get Me in front of a Justice without being arbitrarily arrested again.  No dice.  Duty counsel tells Me there is only twenty-four hours Grace to rescind a bench warrant and I would have to turn My Self into police.  I truly want to smack My head every time I make the mistake of as King of duty counsel anything – I’d be better off as King a random lawyer for advice in the lobby; lawyers are salespeople, they Will be all too happy to share their expertise with You in hopes You might be so impressed with their knowledge You may seek to retain them for counsel.

Although I had just been told I would have to turn My Self into police again, the receptionist at the police station had rekindled the fire of My Will to deal with this matter My Self, one Way or another, so I made an appointment with a Justice of the Peace.  That was even more disappointing.  The Justice told Me he didn’t care about the constitution or human rights, “that’s not the way it works, You will have to turn Your Self over to police.”

Once again, I left furious and frustrated but if I was going to spend the day in jail waiting for some other bonehead to present information to a Justice on My behalf, I’d best get arrested as soon as possible.  So once again I returned to the police office and said I was turning My Self in under duress as I feel My constitutional rights are being trespassed upon.

“Have You tried going to the bail Court and as King of the Justice to hear You now?”

“No, where is the bail court?”

“Courtroom number six.”

“Thank You!”

That is what I had wanted from the moment I heard there was a bench warrant – to find My Way to the Bench!!!  [Common Sense, right?]  I Swear to God, this woman was an Angel!  The moment I left, I knew I was going to have success; I could feel it, it was tangible.

As I walked into Courtroom 6, there was a definite ‘elephant in the room’, vibe.  There was no Justice or Judge, only the Crown, a clerk, and perhaps another lawyer, all sitting behind the bar with no seats left for this King.  I approached the bar, all of them staring at Me intently and stopped just short of passing through.

“Um, do I need to bow if I want to pass the bar without a Judge or Justice here, and does anyone Mind if I do?”

“Well, what are You here for?”, one of them as King of Me.

“Is this a Court of Record?”

“It’s a bail Court”

“Well, I’m tired of being locked up and subject to having someone else administrate My legal matters when I’m supposed to have the presumption of innocence and be brought before a Justice as soon as possible anyway.  I genuinely thought I had Court today, only to find out it was yesterday and that a bench warrant has been issued for My arrest.  I am not okay with being locked up all day when I clearly want to have this matter resolved. And I Will say under Oath and penalty of perjury that I made an honest mistake and want these matters dealt with as soon as possible.”

“I’ll vouch for You and have the bench warrant rescinded, do You Mind waiting in the lobby for a few minutes?”

“Sure, thank You!  May I have Your name, please.”


“Thank You so much, I really appreciate this.”

Needless to say, I was all too happy to wait in the lobby.  Five minutes later, he walks out and says that We still have to wait for the Justice to enter the Court, but he’s removed the bench warrant and We are looking to reschedule for June 28th, “does that sound okay?”

“That’s perfect, thank You.”

I waited another twenty minutes or so in the lobby before I was paged to the Court.  The Courtroom was somewhat busy when I returned, including someone in the prisoner’s box.  When I first spoke with Shouldice, there had been no one in the Courtroom except those who work there.  I took a seat in the back row, figuring it might be a while.  The moment after everyone had resumed seating after the Justice entered the courtroom, Shouldice as King if the court could hear a small matter before those listed on the docket and his request was granted.

“Sean von Dehn mixed up his Court dates and was here today instead of yesterday, Your Honour.  I do believe it was an honest mistake and Will vouch for him, I am as King to have the bench warrant removed and a new date set.”

Once again, the request was Granted and June 28th was suggested for My next court date but the schedule was full for that day.  Next available date was July 5th, Courtroom 8, 9:00 a.m. for Judicial Pre-Trial! 

“Are You available that day?”

Music to My ears, thank You, Your Honour.

The only thing I didn’t like was that I was not acting as My own counsel, Shouldice spoke for Me and generally, I don’t like that.  However, I think he knows how much I generally resent others speaking for Me and sincerely just wanted to do what he could to help, knowing he had influence and credibility with the Justice that would work in My favour.  The Justice doesn’t know anything about Me, so this is one of those times where My knowledge and determination to exercise My rights may be perceived as arrogant which most definitely would not have worked in My favour.  Confidence and arrogance can be a fine line sometimes.

Anyway, I learned a great deal in Court today and am beginning to know My Way around, too.  I’ve also found that although I don’t as King for much help from lawyers, anytime I have, I have been treated with courtesy and respect.  A very special thank You to Shouldice for assisting Me today, it was tremendously appreciated.

Also, a very special thank You to the receptionist of the courtroom police service who would not let Me give up.

Love and Blessings to everyone.  Next Present-A-Sean in Court is July 5th, Courtroom 8, 9:00 a.m., and You are all invited!

Ciao for now. 😉










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